My little boy was 3 in December last year and was starting nursery… we started potty training him..

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My little boy was 3 in December last year and was starting nursery… we started potty training him ready for when he went in January. Still 5 months on and we haven’t cracked it. When at home he either just wee’s himself or takes he trousers down and just wee’s could be anywhere! Number 2’s are a no go on a potty or toilet and we just do them in our pants to. Ive tried everything and have everything. Nursery helped a lot while he was there but we’ve gone backwards totally since not be able to go. I’d just like some advice that isn’t judgemental and some tips if anyone else is struggling with this. Thank you.

‘Personally I’d take a break. He may just be associating stress and worry if getting it right now. He’s over another year until he’s in school. Put him back in nappies, try again in a few weeks with a clear mindset. Encourage him to make the choices then. Potty or toilet? Which underpants? What would he like to do while he tries? Give him control of the small choices so he is less concerned about the bigger change. My eldest had awful constipation so used to have a book while he tried.’

‘ My advice would be that he is just not ready. He will crack it when he is ready. Leave the potty around have him in pull ups. And keep reminding him what the potty/toilet is for but honestly don’t stress. He will get there when he is ready. Get dad to take him to the toilet when he goes so he see’s what daddy does and maybe he will start taking an interest and skip the whole potty stage. It is hard but the more you stress the harder it will be. Take a break and try again in a month or so.’

‘This happened with me eldest little boy… I found going back to the start … ie bringing him every half hour then increasing it by 10 mins helped … it’s so frustrating for everyone maybe pull ups so if he does want to try going toilet he has that option and a huge fuss when he does go on toilet’

‘Just keep practicing, lots of praise, don’t get cross about accidents. And I know it’s bad but sweets worked for us! We also used a rewards chart so my little boy got a bigger reward for a certain number of dry days. Consistency is the key, totally normal to go backwards for a bit. Hang in there mum x’

‘ As a nursery nurse I helped many parents and their children with potty training and if there’s one thing I learned it’s that once you start you shouldn’t go back as it can confuse the child and make toilet training harder when you do decide to try again, however, in your situation, I would have given up by now, take a break from the idea and try again another time. If your nursery doesn’t support your decision it may be wise to rethink your childcare. As long as he cracks it before he goes to school you have nothing to worry about’

‘3 and a half is about right for boys neural pathway to develop (health visitor head on). Rewards don’t go a miss (mum head on) we had great success with moo biscuits ? don’t fret it’ll all come right in the end. Good luck.’

‘Bribery, mine got a day out to the zoo plus a toy from the gift shop if he went 2 weeks being dry all day, then a month later he got a bike if he went 2 weeks dry overnight. He also picked out his own big boy pants from the shops and he didn’t like straining for a poo on the toilet so I used to sit with him and sing Fireman Sam haha. Good luck!’

‘My son and I came up with a song when he needed to go and this helped really well we also discovered Daniel Tiger on you tube ‘When you have to go potty, stop and go right away’! I would let him watch this whilst on the potty and it just all seemed to make sense to him!’

‘Have you tried the toilet seat with the ladder..? It’s the only way I could get my daughter to use the toilet. It had a bowl in it as it could be used as a potty but I just used it with the seat over the toilet until she was used to sitting on the toilet then I took the bowl away and that was her. It was an extremely stressful time and took her a few months to crack it. You feel added pressure when they start nursery to. Luckily her nursery changed the kids if they had an accident but my friends boys didn’t and she had to go and change him every time he had an accident. It’s a hard time for the kids right now so could be due to change in routine etc. But I would keep pushing on(easier said than done I know). The only time we had a break was when trying to potty train at night. I was getting told I was lazy because after a week of wet beds we went back to pull ups for 2 weeks.. tried again and dry from then on.’

‘My little girl has just mastered this during the day. Just like yourself I tried countless times and it didn’t work so I popped the nappy back on and decided when she was ready she would let us know. The potty was left out but it was her choice if she used it. Kids all progress at different rates. Don’t stress as soon as you relax your child will too. Hope this helps.’

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