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No one tells you how hard it is to adjust when the baby does comes….

A baby being breastfed

A reader asks: No one tells you how hard it is to adjust when the baby does comes. I have always had a good routine but I feel like it takes me forever to get anything done. I’m BF so my husband can’t help with the feeding and if I’m not feeding, I’m sleeping! Our baby is only 4 weeks old but will it get easier as she grows? thanks x


  1. I’m a first time mum. I’d say the challenges change as they grow and develop. You slowly adjust and have good days and bad days… But the good outweigh them! I found the sleep deprivation so so very hard and it still can be at times but would not swap this experience for the world and now as my baby is 11monthsband I’m facing the dreaded return to work I’d do it all over again in a flash.2.I don’t know if it gets easier exactly but you just learn how to cope. I have a 4 year old and a 3 year old. When youngest was born I had only just felt like I had gotten into a manageable routine with the first and suddenly I had a toddler and a newborn! Had to relearn everything but I got the swing of it. New challenges arise with every year, used to be night feeds and weaning, now its school and nursery runs. Motherhood is exhausting and that wont change and even when your baby is a bit older you will still have the odd sleepless night and the days where you feel like you’re running on fumes but you always manage. That’s what makes us mums so kickass! Because a lot of the time we do everything and we do it well xxx

    3.It will get much easier, my son is nearly 8 weeks old now and over the last week or so we have got into our own routine naturally and he is exclusively breastfed. I think once they build their weight up it makes the world of difference to how often they are feeding.

    4.My son is exclusively breast fed but during the first few weeks I would express my milk so that my husband could feed him with a bottle which allowed me to have a bit more sleep and some time to myself.
    My son is 4 months old but I still find it hard to get stuff done. He has a chair that he sits in so when I’m trying to do the cleaning, washing up etc I sit him in it near to me. He can either play with the toys on the chair or watch me but it does at least allow me to do some housework!
    It does get easier but remember your baby is only 4 weeks old and is busy learning about the world and getting into their own routine – just go with the flow and before you know it you’ll start to get back to some sort of normality.

    5. Yes it will get easier! There will be different challenges as baby grows and you will have good days and bad days (even when they’re 4! That’s the oldest I’ve got to so far). But you’re growing and learning all the time too – you find ways to get things done and methods to make your life easier – before you know it you’ll be a pro at this parenting thing! Or at least be very good at making it look easy to all the new mums out there. I’ve exclusively breastfed all my babies but your partner can help in other ways (even if it’s as simple as not moaning at you if the dishes aren’t done). The first few weeks are definitely the hardest but it is worth it and before you know it you’ll be rewarded with smiles from your gorgeous baby and all the other exciting milestones that follow.

    6. I feel your frustrations! I have a 4 week old and a 3 and a half-year-old. The baby is only really happy being held so I’m wearing her in a sling a lot of the time. I’m BF too. It does improve and having done it before with my first child, the time does go quickly and you can’t get that time back. They aren’t little for long. I know that’s no consolation but hang in there. Hopefully you have a good support network to help out as that’s important too x

    7. Your baby is four weeks old, food and sleep is all that’s important, but yes when baby starts to go a little bit longer between feeds and at night a routine will help massively, and you will get into the swing of things, for now enjoy your baby x

    8. Of course it will. Some days felt like my son was on the boob ALL day. Or I feel guilty coz after getting up 9 times through the night I have a 2 1/2 hour nap with baby in the day – but you know what I had to sleep (God knows why he didn’t sleep that long at night!) your a just baby grows and life gets sorted! Relax.

    9. Lol I didn’t go out with my son on my own until he was about 5 weeks old and he lived in babygros for the same time, just relax and enjoy your time with your baby.

    10. This could have been me writing this when my son was born!! It took me a long while to adjust – it was a shock to my system that’s for sure! It does get better though, believe me! I couldn’t cope at first & didn’t understand how I’d be ale to do it all…but every day, week & month will get easier & easier. You can do it! xx

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