What better advice is there than parent to parent recommendation from those that know what you are going through. Please feel free to send us your questions for our FB page.
A reader asks: We have just found out that we are expecting our 3rd baby. Our current youngest is 8yrs old so we are going right back to the beginning. We are all really excited but I am worried about not having as much energy this time round. (I am 39) how did other parents find having a gap and then another baby? thanks x
‘ I had my first aged 37 and my second aged 40 and it is tiring but totally doable! I find being older has given me much more patience and I’m less neurotic second time around! LOL ? It’s a different journey but a better one. You’ll slip straight back on to it with ease because you’ll automatically remember things from before and you’ll manage it. Having older kids means they can help out and also get a great insight in to having a baby and raising children, so it’s a nice learning experience for them too. Good luck with it all and enjoy it, it’ll all be worth it’
‘I have friends with a similar age gap and they have done a great job. Their older child would help out, like actually help not pretend and hinder. Mum could go have a shower or bath from day 1 as the older child would happily sit with the baby. They still play together nicely and you do get more time to get bits done as your not having to watch a young child with a baby. I think the energy depends on you. I have half brothers who are 18+ yes younger than me, but although my dad went grey pretty quick he is still doing everything he can with the younger ones and I think kinda enjoys the challenge to ‘stay young’. Congratulations and enjoy.’
‘We have an 8yr old, 6yr old and a 4mth old, the older kids are a great help especially when you need a few mins for a shower or the loo lol, and they love being involved. My older two even ask to change nappies lol (I over look the nappy change) we have found we are much more patient this time round and just go with it. I found the school run a challenge at first but once in a routine it’s fine. The broken nights are a challenge especially with other kids to sort and get to activities etc but it’s worth it and it’s only a short time till they start sleeping through x you’ll be fine, you just get on with it lol x x it’s all worth it for sure’
‘I had my first at 19 and my second at 36, almost 16 years age gap. I have found the energy thing a bit tough sometimes but it cancels itself out with other things. I find I have more patience and worry a lot less about what other people think (which saves a lot of energy). My little girl didn’t sleep for 2 years and I managed every night, didn’t even notice it at the time. I wouldn’t worry too much about the energy thin you’ll be great’
‘I’ve just had my wee girl at 40 and her big sister is 8. The age gap actually works really well. They are that bit older and are able to help you and do some things of themselves. I am no more tired than I was 8 years ago! Good luck!’
‘I’m the youngest of three with 8 and 10 years between me and my siblings. My mother was 38 when she had me and yes, she admits not having had as much energy with me as she did the others (granted as she was 10 years younger!) but having two older sisters, it was like having three mothers! The older girls were much more self sufficient and managed to help with small chores and they entertained me, probably much more than my mother could have done no matter what age! Congratulations and wishing you the best of luck !’
‘There’s 7 years between my then youngest & my (surprise) twins. I was 36 when I had them. I definitely struggle with energy this time round but I honestly think that’s more to do with there being 2 of them than my age ?. On the plus side, the older kids were all old enough to help.’
‘I was 37 with youngest who is 5 months old now and his brother is nearly 12. 11 and half year gap. You do feel like your a starting out mum all over again but soon get used to it and my other son is fab and over the moon with his baby brother.’
‘What you have lost in energy you will have gained in wisdom. I had a seventeen year age gap . I can honestly say I enjoyed it so much more. I was in a better place emotionally and financially.’
‘There’s 16 years between my oldest and youngest.. they love each other and get on so well… I was 41 when my youngest was born, it was fine.. tiring obviously, but it all worked out.. and I eat/am a single parent.. you’ll be fine… Good luck.’
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